- "Just say it already"
- We don't just say it because we are afraid of what may happen if we do. But I think sometimes the better question is what happens if we don't. What will we sacrifice in our ministry or leadership or life if we choose not to engage in those Fierce Conversation. (this web site is part of Susan Scott's material from her book with the same title. Great stuff)
- We don't just say it because we think it will work itself out. Quite frankly it does sometimes and maybe we have gained a small victory, but in the process lost some desire to communicate with the other person. When this happens distance is created in the relationship.
- We don't just say it because we avoid a fight that way. I can tell you that for me this is true. When people come to me with issues about me that I disagree with I typically get angry first and get rational second. I am not saying that this is good, it is just the way I am and because of that I think that people who know me best may not even "just say it" to me. (side note this is not an call to everyone who has ever wanted to tell me something to come out of the wood works. I did not say I had a handle on it yet) HA HA
Maybe this week you need to have some of those "Just Say It Already" conversations and see what happens. hey at least you will not have to spend 3 hours talking about nothing and get nothing resolved. Just know that in these types of conversations there is someone else involved and they may not respond the way that you want them to immediately. Give them time to process everything and consider coming back for a follow-up conversation.
Talk to you all Wednesday
2 comments:
I think I understand your point... On the flip side of this is me, well, past me..
When I first got to college, I was dealing with a lot of baggage, and learning to speak my mind. Well, I went a little overboard with it. I got rude with people. I thought I was funny by being blunt all the time and speaking my mind. What I did what hurt and marginalize others, and alienate myself..
Most of my best college friends have told me that they didn't like me at first, because of my mouth and how I treated people.. I had a lot of apologizing and learning to do.
So there needs to be a balance (I think). You can share the important stuff and just say it, but it also needs to be done in a loving way. We only have the written word to interpret how Jesus spoke to the woman at the well, not an instant playback. While He "just said it", I'm sure it was done in a way that tranformed her life, not imploded her self image.
good point Brandon. I would totally agree that everything said should be seasoned with grace. That is the whole message of Jesus. Balance is a good choice of words. Doing nothing is the problem.
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