Susie and I are excited to announce the pre-release book/workbook, “30daysexchallenge-A Journey to Intimacy”

With all of the buzz about 30 days of sex, 101 days of sex, and even 365 days of sex, we are confident that those who are looking to improve their relationship for the long-run will find that 30daysexchallenge-A Journey to Intimacy, will provide them with the knowledge and practical help that they will need in order to build intimacy, not just for 30 days, but for the rest of their lives together. 30daysexchallenge takes a holistic approach to intimacy and guides the couple into four mini-challenges: spiritual, emotional, sexual, and physical. After each challenge is studied the couple is ready to engage in 30 days of sex. However, the challenge is not just 30 days of sex. We have provided 30 days of questions that encourages continued intimacy in the four areas studied, and will cultivate and promote an environment of love and passion.

But don’t take our word for it. Hear what Dr. David Clarke has to say about the 30daysexchallenge-A Journey to Intimacy.

“Do you want to learn how to bond with your spouse spiritually and emotionally? Do you want a better-much better-sex life? Of course you do. I do. We all do. The 30 Day Sex Challenge will help you get the marital intimacy you've lost. It's easy to read, refreshingly honest, intensely practical, and based on the Bible. Best of all, it works!”

David Clarke, Ph.D.
Christian psychologist and author of Cinderella Meets the Caveman


To purchase a pre-release copy of the book click below:

Sometime I am too Blessed

I received an email from a dear friend and children's worker of our today and it was about my daughter Ashlyn through the eyes of two other children. I truly have never been so touched in all my life. I am blessed to have a daughter like Ashlyn and friends like this. I hope this blesses you as much as it did me.

I just a discussion with my sons that I thought I would share. I've been working in children's church the last couple of weeks. Today Wesly was watching Ashlyn. He caught me off to the side and began asking questions (for 10 I thought he was very discreet). I told him we'd talk later. As is our tradition at the end of the day when tucking them in we talk about things that happened that day and Ashlyn came up. As best I could I explained the situation. I explained that she was sick... and that despite her body growing up her mind was staying very much like a child. I couldn't think of a better way to explain it. Wesly had quite a few questions. After the expected bout of questions... how she got sick... was it contagious...etc. He looked at me and teared up and said... "Daddy... she's not going to get better is she?" My answer (through tears) was that there was no known cure. But that in history smart men have been blessed by God to find cures for things that were thought to be impossible to cure.... that I didn't know if we would see a cure in our lifetimes or not, but that it wasn't impossible. He thought about it for a while and began to cry. I asked if I could help him with something... and he said "I bet her mommy and daddy cry." Then we all teared up. After a minute he comforted me and said, "Daddy... when we get to heaven she wont be sick anymore.... remember... you said there is no sickness there." In amazement at that statement... I agreed and tucked them in and stepped out. After a minute Wesly called me back into the room. He explained that he no longer wanted to be an Ice Cream maker when he grew up (this has been his dream for a year or so). I asked him why not... and he told me that he wanted to be a scientist researcher... and find a cure because he wanted to see her better before heaven. After I composed myself I told him that he was a smart boy and if thats what he wanted to do I believed he may be able to do it someday.

At this point Jacob... who had been on the bottom bunk listening the whole time piped in and said, "I know what I want to do." Wes and I both looked and he said, "I just want to be her friend."

Wow.

I debated sending this email.... I'm sure you guys get alot of emails from folks about it... and I didn't want to be just another email or comment from folks about how they felt sorry for you... but the insight from the minds of children I thought was a blessing that I couldn't help but share. God has blessed you and placed a burden that we cant fathom and wont pretend to. Just wanted to let you guys know that our family prays for you and that there are two little boys over here tonight that have absolutely determined that they are going to be Ashyln's friend. And a daddy who cant stop tearing up.

She will be healed one day!!!! Thank you God.

Mental Toughness Recap

So this past Sunday we looked at the idea of "McGyvering It". Do you remember the show McGyver he was amazing!! I have never seen anyone in a bomer jacket with a mullet as sweet as his do so many cool things, and all in the middle of stressful situations. So this begs the question, how do you respond in the middle of crisis or stress? From athletes, to zoo keepers we all deal with situations that cause us to scratch our heads sometimes and wonder how in the world that we are going to make it through. I think that the key to all of this is mental toughness. I know for me every morning I am faced with the reality that there is a treadmill and weight bench calling my name and I have a choice to make when my body says no to have my mind say yes. And I can honestly say that for the past 30 days I have worked out 5 days per week and the amazing thing is that my body is responding to my mind telling it what it is supposed to do. To date I have lost 15lbs and have lost a whole pants size. I am stoked and am really loving the way that I am feeling because of it. So I just wanted to encourage everyone where ever you are on this journey of fitness to just not quit keep going and the results will follow. I think that this is true physically, spiritually, and mentally. So here are the key points from this past weekend in case you missed them.

Tools for Mental Toughness:

1. Listen to the experts. PRAY ABOUT EVERYTHING Check out success stories in magazines and the Internet - fitness, money, or otherwise - you'll find they are people JUST LIKE YOU. So if they can do it, WHY CAN'T YOU?

Philippians 4:13 (NLT)
13For I can do everything with the help of Christ who gives me the strength I need.


2. No pain, no gain vs. Patience, pacing, and persistence. PUT INTO PRACTICE WHAT YOU LEARNED. When you realize that failure and handicaps have NOT prevented winners in any area of life, you gain more confidence and courage to pursue your own dreams.

Phil 4:9
9Keep putting into practice all you learned from me and heard from me and saw me doing, and the God of peace will be with you.

3. "What next?" thinking. "KEEP MOVING FORWARD" -"Walt Disney" Give yourself solution-oriented feedback when solving your problems. Don't dwell on what went wrong. What are you going to do about it? Spend your energy on moving forward, finding an answer.

Phil 4:12
12 I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection! But I keep working toward that day when I will finally be all that Christ Jesus saved me for and wants me to be.

4. Get comfortable with the unfamiliar. Make it a part of your daily routine to do something totally different than what you normally do. You'll be better prepared to handle diverse environments with greater calm and confidence.

Matthew 5:43-48 (The Message)
43“You’re familiar with the old written law, ‘Love your friend,’ and its unwritten companion, ‘Hate your enemy.’ 44I’m challenging that. I’m telling you to love your enemies. Let them bring out the best in you, not the worst. When someone gives you a hard time, respond with the energies of prayer, 45for then you are working out of your true selves, your God-created selve

5. THINK AND SPEAK WELL OF YOUR HEALTH. THINK ABOUT WHAT IS TRUE AND RIGHT. We tend to make real what is the "main feature" of ourselves. What's YOUR "main feature"?

Phil 4:8
8 And now, dear brothers and sisters, let me say one more thing as I close this letter. Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right.


6. Don't be a victim of ads and fads. DON'T COPY THE BEHAVIORS AND CUSTOMS OF THIS WORLD. Yes, the world is full of greedy people looking for a fast and easy way to put your money in their pockets. Make sure the thing that impresses you meets your criteria, and satisfies your concerns.

Romans 12:2
2Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think.

7. Hang out with people who have already achieved their goals or who are dedicated to goals similar to yours. Avoid associating with people who have the same unresolved problems or who are frustrated by their lack of achievement. You know, the pity parties. "Oh, woe is me. My life is in an upheaval. How about you?" "You poor thing. Woe is me, too. I feel terrible about myself. How about you?"

Proverbs 27:17
17As iron sharpens iron, a friend sharpens a friend.

8. Focus on desired results. Pure and simple: winners dwell on the rewards of success. Losers focus on mistakes and failure. Do what's necessary NOW. Be in the present. Then you don't have to worry about what happened yesterday or what's going to happen tomorrow.

Philippians 4:12-14 (NLT)
12I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection! But I keep working toward that day when I will finally be all that Christ Jesus saved me for and wants me to be. 13No, dear brothers and sisters, I am still not all I should be, but I am focusing all my energies on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, 14I strain to reach the end of the race and receive the prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us up to heave

9. Expect the unexpected. You can't control what happens and what others do. You can anticipate what MAY happen, and prepare for them as best you can. You can also control your response to what happens.

Philippians 4:6-8
6Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. 7If you do this, you will experience God’s peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

Hope this helps you guys on your journey.

Thursday Morning Thoughts

This week has been a roller coaster week, so to speak, around here and it has prompted me to reflect on a few things that I thought I would share with everyone.

1. Life is really short- Monday night I received a phone call from one of our members informing me that Dr. Forrest Pollock and his son had gone missing in their plane. Tuesday morning the search was over and they had found Dr. Pollock's plane wreckage and there were no survivors. I could not help but think of his wife and other 5 children and a church family that is crushed by this whole situation. I hugged my kids a bit tighter Tuesday night and reflected on the idea of what legacy would I leave if God were to take me home today.

2. Comebacks are awesome- I know that you have not heard a baseball story in a while so here is one for the record books. As many of you know Anthony has been playing his first season of baseball and at the beginning of the season things were not going so well. That is not the case now. He is now batting second and is about to make me go broke because of a deal I made with him that for every hit I would give him $5. Well Tuesday night was the second round of the tournament and our Tigers were down 7-0 in the bottom of the 3rd inning. I told Anthony this game is not over if you guys will just play your game. So that inning they did just that and scored the max 5 runs. So we have a score of 7-5 at the top of the 4th inning well things did not go so well on defense and the other team scored 2 more runs making it 9-5 in the bottom of the fourth inning. Well this was going to be it because there was not enough time to play another inning, however, we were at the bottom of our batting order. You know the guys who struggle a bit when they are up to bat. Well the 5th, 6th, and 7th batter got on base and then scored on pass balls then the 8th batter struck out. So here we were the score 9-8 with batters 9-11 up. Well number 9 leads off with a single up the middle, then number 10 hits a double to right field and the game is all tied up with the number 11 batter up. Now you must know that the number 11 batter has only had 2 hits all season. But tonight was his night, he has a great swing but has just not connected with one yet. Well he takes a strike, then a ball, then another strike, then another ball, then he connects and it is a bomb to right field that goes all the way to the fence. Well, crazy legs as we call him is trucking around the bases and by the time he gets to third he has caught up with the number 10 guy and they both run home for a 11-9 win. WOW!!! Can you believe a bunch of 9, 10, and 11 year old kids have the heart to come back for certain defeat. Why is it that as adults when faced with difficult times we often times quit instead of busting through and see the win? Boy I sure enjoyed watching and learning from theses kids. I want to be like them.

Working out is actually fun- yes I know that this sounds crazy but I am actually enjoying doing this whole workout thing. I am now on week three and I have not missed a day. I am so stoked . I have not checked the weight this week yet because I usually do that on Friday but I will let you know. I trust that many of you have decided to get off of the couch during this series and will continue the journey to fitness. Here is what one person said after viewing the burst training video.

Yeah!!!!
I am so glad I go to Relevant Church!!
I downloaded the Rocky sound track to my iPOD and Monday when the video didn't make it online I went jogging and jammed out eye of the tiger!
Today I am going out to my shed and dust off that old home gym wait bench!
I wasn't going to do it but after watching Paul do the burst training I gota try it ha ha!
You Guys Rock!

Well if you have not checked out the video or tried the Burst Training check out the BLOG. Let me remind you this is pretty intense.

Paul