Monday, November 17, 2008

"I Don't Want to"

Have you ever heard that before? have you ever said that before? I dare say all of us from time to time have wrestled with this notion "I don't want to" I know I have many times in my life. The strange thing is this attitude does not just happen to me it happens to my kids as well. I know many of you watched my update from Friday and commented on how awesome Ashlyn was in the video, and she was. But just two days before that she had an I don't want to moment before going to school.

It was Wednesday morning, Susie had to teach so I was left with kid duty. This mean s I have to make sure that they get ready, have the lunches made, and take Ashlyn to school on my way in to the office. (Did I mention that when this happens I cannot ride my bike in the morning? UGH)
Well on this faithful morning after Anthony and Susie had already left I proceeded to instruct Ashlyn that she needed to get dressed. Here response to me was less that desirable "I don't want to" is all that I received. To which I responded in kind. Well you better get dressed or you are going to be late for school and you are going to get in trouble. She did not care at this point, she had already made her decision, trouble or no trouble she was not going to get dressed when I wanted her to get dressed. After continual prompting she did get dressed and yes she did get in trouble at school for being late. So the next day she was dressed 30 minutes early and came into Susie and I's room and said I am ready for school. I am not getting in trouble today dad.

What I think is interesting is that this whole idea of "I don't want to" does not just effect 12 year old special needs kids who do not want to get dressed for school. It effects every single person on the face of the earth.
But what happens when you as a leader get to the place where you say "I don't want to"? Whatever the I do not want to is does not make a difference. But there comes a time and place where you put you foot down and say no do not want to do it no matter what happens. This has happened to me on different occasions and sometimes the outcome has been good and I needed to say I don't want to and sometimes the outcome has been bad because I said no to something I should have done. I think the key is recognizing the difference between the two.

Keys to Remember
  • you do not have to do everything that everyone says that you need to do
  • Saying "I don't want to" is not always bad
  • you better do what God is telling you to do
  • have a reason for your I don't want to
  • just because you don't want to does not mean it is a bad idea or a wrong idea
  • the key word in the phrase is "I" it is personal

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